


Love Stuck

by officeriddler



Series: Saphael: The Beginning [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Jealous Raphael, M/M, Mutual Pining, Nosy Shadowhunters, Oblivious Simon, Pining Simon, They're really good friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-13 08:15:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11755725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/officeriddler/pseuds/officeriddler
Summary: Simon is oh so desperately in love with Raphael,  but has yet to pursue a relationship with him. His friends decide to step in and kick-start their epic romance.My Inevitable Demise in Simon's POV.





	Love Stuck

Simon knows he finally figured it out on a Saturday, because it just so happened that that Saturday was the anniversary of his father’s death. He used to spend the day with his family eating junk food, watching Magnolia, and falling asleep on the couch together, pretending they couldn’t hear each other cry themselves into uneasy slumber. It was a tradition of a sort. But that had changed, of course, when Simon became a vampire.

It was around 4 am. Dry sobs wracked their way through Simon’s cold body, and all he wanted was to shrivel up into a ball under his covers and pretend that the world around him didn’t exist. That he didn’t exist. His hand would reach out every now and again, expecting to feel the warmth of his sister or mom beside him. It would then recoil when feeling only the cold, unforgiving comforter, and a feeling of utter loneliness would creep it’s way from his fingertips to his heart. In a heartbreaking moment, he thought of how Clary was probably curled up in bed, sleeping easy with Jace by her side. He thought of how Isabelle was never lonely, and would most likely have a companion by her side right now. Hell, in a fleeting moment he was even jealous of Alec for having someone to lean on. It was then, he realized, that he had no one to cry to.

For a second, the image of someone who looked eerily like Raphael entered his mind, and Simon brushed it off as quickly as it came. “Who am I kidding?” he thought bitterly to himself, “I could never cry to him.”

But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get Raphael’s face out of his mind. He could only think of the concerned look in his eyes today when he saw him. 

“Are you doing okay, fledgling?” he had asked. Fledgling used to be somewhat of a term of insult he used, but lately it had become more of an endearing nickname than anything.

Simon but on his best, brightest, fakest smile. “Of course, Raph,” he replied. “Never better.”

“Don’t lie to me, Simon,” he said with a fierce but caring look in his eyes. The kind of look you could only expect from a mother scolding a child for endangering them self.

“I’d never lie to you Raph,” said Simon, lying so easily about how he was feeling it scared him. “I’m fine, really.”

It was ironic, really. He had been so careful with hiding his emotions with Raphael earlier, and now all he can think about is running into his strong, soft arms, where he knows he’ll be safe. Forever.

“Oh my God,” thought Simon to himself. “Oh my lord, father in heaven. I’m in love with Raphael Santiago.”

 

From that point on, whenever Simon saw Raphael, he’d turn into a nervous, flustered wreck. He’d talk at twice the normal pace he usually did, his breaths would become short and fast, and his eyes would constantly drift to places on Raphael’s body where eyes should not drift. The worst part of it was, the whole clan had caught on. Well, almost the whole clan. The apple of Simon’s eye himself remained completely oblivious to it all, and Simon expected that he had just grown more repulsed with him over time. Whenever they were in the same room together he would make up excuses to leave, and whenever Simon felt brave and moved a little closer to Raphael, his eyes would go wide and he would back away with a look that was almost like fear etched upon his face. He hated Simon so much that he even growled when other vampires went near the fledgling for fear of them catching his ‘Simon-ness’. At least, that’s what Simon told himself.

The others were so oblivious to Raphael’s hatred for Simon that they continued on trying to force them together, and even locked them in a closet. Raphael broke them out in three seconds flat, nearly breaking Simon’s heart in the process. Simon eventually accepted that Raphael could never love him back, so he was reduced to doing unsavory things just to catch a glimpse of the angelic clan leader. This included making up excuses to go into his room when he was going to bed. Some of the questions he would ask him are:

“Raph, I was wondering what would happen if I drank my own blood. Like, would I get energy from it or lose energy?”

“Raph, how does someone become clan leader? Do you have to kill the previously leader, or is there like an application you fill out?”

And my personal favourite, “Raph, since vampires hearts don’t beat, and the heart pumps blood throughout the body, do vampires not get erections?”

Of course, Simon already knew the answer to that question.

It was clear to most people around him that he was absolutely hopeless when it came to his crush on Raphael. So, his best friends decided to do that best friend thing, and make his unsuccessful love life his business.

Jace, Clary, and Isabelle had begun visiting the Hotel a lot more often since they found out about Simon’s not-so-little crush. They also started flirting with him quite a bit, a bit too much for comfort. He first realized what they were doing when Simon had said an -admittedly- awful joke about what the angel said to the wood sprite (hint: it wasn’t anything that could’ve been said in church) and they all laughed their heads off: Izzy and Clary leaning back while flipping their hair and Jace putting a hand on Simon’s shoulder. It was quite clear that something was up, Jace never laughed at his jokes. He only realized their intention when he saw Raphael across the room, an angrier-than-usual look on his face. It clicked- they were trying to make him jealous. He later attempted to explain to them that it wouldn’t work- that Raphael hated him, but they only shook their heads and laughed some more. A question, however, plagued Simon’s mind that night: why in the hell did he look so angry?

One particularly boring evening, Simon decided to hit up his flirty friends, and ask them to come over for a movie night. They all happily agreed, and Izzy even jokingly told him to wear something sexy. At least, he thinks she was joking. He can never really tell with his friends these days. Nonetheless, he decided to put on some tight skinny jeans and a black tank top. He normally wouldn’t, but he had become more comfortable with exposing more of his body since having to endure Raphael’s relentless training schedule, which has made him significantly more toned. 

The three shadowhunters soon showed up at his door, clutching bags of snack and pillows with lazy, happy expressions. Isabelle grinned when she saw him, “I see you took my advice,” she said with a glint in her eye, “you look hot.”

Jace smirked and made his way into Simon’s room, pringles in hand, “Not hotter than me though.”

Simon stuck his tongue out childishly, “You wish, golden boy.”

His friendly banter with Jace had become much more, well, friendly as time passed and Simon got over Clary. Only to fall in love with someone more impossibly out of his reach, it seemed.

They all sat on the couch: Jace on the far left with Clary next to him, and Isabelle on the far right leaving Simon between the two of them. They had just popped in Simon’s movie pick of the night (Star Wars: Return of the Jedi) when Isabelle’s phone went off and she gasped. 

“Raphael’s coming this way! Quick, Clary, get on his lap. And Jace, get closer to him and do something sexy with your arm. This is not a drill, people!”

“Figures that the vampires and the shadowhunters are in cohorts,” thought Simon, “Figures they would all act incredibly inappropriately around me to embarrass me in front of the guy I love, who hates me." Raphael walked into the room just as Izzy began braiding Simon’s hair. What a sight he must be, with a short redheaded shadowhunter in his lap and a blond’s arm around his shoulder touching his ear playfully every now and again. It can only be assumed that they actually took the time and effort to practice this. Simon didn’t know whether to be touched or disturbed. 

The clan leader took a seat on the couch next to Simon. “What are we watching?” asked Raphael, baring his fangs just enough for the poor boy attraction overload.

“Star Wars: Return of the Jedi,” replied Izzy, her long fingernails raking uncomfortably down Simon’s scalp. “It’s Simon’s favourite movie. Isn’t that right, baby.”

Oh God why did they have to embarrass him like this? “Yeah, umm, i-it is,” Simon managed to choke out.

Clary piped up from her seat on Simon’s lap, “Aww c’mon baby, no need to be shy. After all, it’s just Raphael.” Well now they were just teasing him. Simon couldn’t pretend that it didn’t hurt a little, to have his friends make fun of him in front of his crush, especially when the crush in question hates him with a burning passion. They didn’t seem to notice Simon’s uneasiness with the whole thing for most of the movie. They didn’t notice the way he’d try to subtly push Clary off him, or the way he shrieked whenever Jace’s hand traveled a little too far down his back. The massage Izzy was giving him did feel awful nice though, nice enough to-

“Uhh,” Simon’s train of thought was broken off by his own moan. The embarrassment was too much for him to take. He shrunk down as far as he could into the cushions, trying oh so desperately to not be there right now. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. Fuck Izzy, sorry.”

Izzy, it seemed, had not given up her task of having Simon make a fool of himself in front of his crush, and relentlessly rubbed on that same spot, trying to elicit another moan from the poor boy. Jace decided to speak up after a night of silence, and said the worst thing he could have possibly said at that moment.

“Don’t worry about it baby. After all, it’s nothing we haven’t heard before, is it?”

“Fuck me,” thought Simon, “Fuck me and my friends who think it’s too fucking funny to make fun of me in front of Raphael. Now he’s going to think I’m so weird kinky fucker who does shit with his friends. Fuck him for being so goddamned hot and oh look he’s getting up from the couch to leave.”

However, Raphael was not getting up from the couch to leave. Quite the opposite, in fact. He pushed Clary of Simon’s lap with murder in his eyes. “Raph, what the fu-” he began, shutting up when his love pushed him back into the couch and straddled him, perfect knees on either side of his legs. Simon thought his heart was going to jump out of his chest when Raphael leaned in close and whispered in his ear. “Is this okay?” The older vampire asked, leaving Simon very confused, but very willing. He nodded hastily. “Wait, the fuck?” Thought the fledgling to himself, “This can’t be Raphael, it must be his twin brother or something. It can’t be him. Fuck, why is it so hot in here?”

The clan leader leaned back from Simon’s ear -making him practically whine is protest- only to hover his lips above the baby vampire’s, teasingly close. “Is this okay?” asked Raphael once more in a breathless, desperate tone, that would’ve made Simon fall to his knees had he been standing. His love’s hands roamed his body with intent and precision, like a potter spinning a careful, intricate vase. Once more, Simon nodded because yes, that was very much okay.

A surge of confidence broke through him, causing the younger vampire to grab the older’s cheeks and kiss him like it was the last time he would ever do so. Simon had fantasized this moment dozens of times, planned out how loving and careful and good he’d make it. All that went out the window the second their lips’ touched. Raphael and Simon’s first kiss was messy and uncoordinated and thoughtless, but it was perfect because of the what they were feeling, and how they’re hearts appeared to beat as one.

They heard cheering in the background; the catcalls of Jace and Izzy and the enjoyed hollering of Clary. Someone definitely snapped a photo of the two lovebirds. When they reluctantly broke away, the newly confident and smooth Simon asked, “Was that okay?” Leaving Raphael to be the one grinning and nodding like an idiot. 

“It’s about time,” said the redheaded shadowhunter, “I thought it would never happen. It was like watching two children try to walk up a down elevator. Cute, but sad. You see why we had to step in.” Simon would have to remember to generously thank his annoying friends for all their hard work. After all, it was them who made the oblivious and hopeless boys finally stop doubting themselves and get together.

“Which reminds me,” said Jace, “Magnus owes me twenty bucks.”

Simon chuckled. “Which is what you owe us for the picture,” he said, “That’s quality porn right there.”

Izzy scoffed, “It’s just proof, little vampire. Magnus said he required it to hold up his end of the bet. Also, to hold it over you boyfriend for the rest of eternity.”

Raphael growled, “I will make you wish you’d never been born, shadowhunter. That’s a promise.”

“Aww c’mon Raph,” said Simon, pulling out his best puppy-dog eyes on his new boyfriend, “They’re my friends, you wouldn’t really hurt them, would you? They were only trying to help. And it worked, didn’t it? You’re lucky you get jealous, by the way. Otherwise this might’ve never happened.” He half-hoped Raphael would take his rambling as an invitation to shut him up in a creative way.

“Dios,” said Raphael, “You, my love, will be the death of me.”

Simon squinted at him, “Hate to break it to you, but we’re already dead.”

“Jesus Christ, mi amore, please just shut up,” pleaded Raphael before giving Simon the best second kiss he could have hoped for.

**Author's Note:**

> Written by demand! I hope you all enjoy Simon's take on My Inevitable Demise.
> 
> Title was inspired by 'Love Stuck' by Mother Mother.


End file.
